Richard Esber Kachkar
Credits: Facebook photo
Kachkar, 46, is charged with murder and dangerous driving in the death of Toronto police Sgt. Ryan Russell who was killed in January 2011 by a stolen snowplow driven by the accused.
In the police interview, Kachkar was asked if he thought it would be more tragic if anyone but a police officer, such as a child, were killed.
"It would be tragic if it was anyone," said Kachkar, who was living in a men's shelter when Russell was killed.
Kachkar was asked how he felt about police, especially since they have had to respond to places where he has lived.
"They protect people. They are always there for you," said Kachkar in a taped police interview.
"I am sad for what I did. Russell's son doesn't have a daddy. Sorry isn't even a word. It was an accident and wasn't meant to be. I never planned it," said Kachkar, who was asked what he would say to the Russell family.
"I shouldn't have been out there. It shouldn't have happened. You have seen I'm not well. Something is wrong with me," he said.
Kachkar told police how he stood on a mid-town Toronto bridge thinking of committing suicide and how he had problems with his wife and kids.
He continuously told police he doesn't remember anything about plowing down Russell on Avenue Road, as well as that he didn't know what he was doing or where he was going.
"I was just running. I don't know where. It was like a dream. I wish I would go away some place," he said.
The jury in the trial has inaccurate transcripts, said Det. Douglas Dustin, the first cop to interview Kachkar.
The jury were given transcripts because the sound was so poor.
"The transcripts have mistakes," Dustin said.
In one case when Kachkar was asked to recall the day in question the transcript reads, "I'm so sorry."
Douglas said his notes for the same question said, "It's so blurry."
Kachkar's defence has conceded he was behind the wheel of the snowplow when it struck and killed Russell, however he has pleaded not guilty because of his state of mind at the time.